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She wanted to take her hand away from his, found his touch too evocative, and yet didn’t move to break the contact.
From the moment she’d heard he’d returned to town, she realized she’d been waiting for him to touch her, to attempt to rekindle the flames of desire that had burned so brightly between them years before.
She closed her eyes, wishing herself back in time when life was less complicated and there were no ghosts to haunt her happiness. A time when she’d loved Derek with no reservation, with a pure, unconditional love.
She suppressed a shiver as his touch moved from the back of her hand to the side of her face. She knew she should stop him, that she shouldn’t allow him to touch her with the intimacy of a lover. But she didn’t want to fight the sweet swell of passion that welled up inside her. It had been so long. Too long.
Opening her eyes, she gazed at him and saw her desire reflected in the brown depths of his eyes. His fingertips traced down the length of her jaw, then up to the outline of her lips.
“I didn’t think it was possible that you could grow more beautiful, but you have,” he said, his voice deep and husky.
She knew he was about to kiss her, and she did nothing to stop him. Rather she leaned forward, subtly encouraging him to claim her mouth with his. And he did. Tentative at first, then he deepened the kiss with a thrust of his tongue.
Immediately Belinda was cast into the past, to that time when her love for Derek had known no boundaries. She wrapped her arms around his neck, wanting the kiss to last forever. With his lips on hers, the heartaches of the past disappeared and the worries of the future fell away. There was only this moment and this man.
The kiss seemed to linger forever yet still be too brief. With a swiftness that stole her breath away, he released her and stood. With his back to her, he looked stiff and unyielding, his posture rigid as if in anger.
“Was it all lies, Derek?” she asked softly. “Everything we shared three years ago?”
He turned around to face her, his eyes dark and unfathomable. “No, it wasn’t lies. It was childish dreams. But we aren’t children any longer.”
His words stirred her bitterness, the bitterness that was never far from the surface. Her love for him had been a woman’s love and the knowledge that he could dismiss it as part of childhood ached in her heart. “Then why did you just kiss me?”
He smiled, a gesture that curved his lips but didn’t touch the darkness of his eyes. “Because I wanted to, and you looked like you wanted it, too. Consider it a momentary regression.”
“I’ll simply consider it a mistake.” She stood, the cold morning air suddenly chilling her throughout. “The day’s a’wasting. I’d better get back.”
She was grateful he said no more, but felt his gaze lingering on her as she walked away. She didn’t stop walking until she was back on her porch.
Leaning on the railing, she replayed that moment of his kiss in her mind. How easily his kiss had cast her back in time, making her momentarily forget his betrayal, the ache of loss, the pain of a breaking heart. But she could never forget or forgive how easily he’d walked out of her life before.
Unwilling to continue entertaining thoughts of Derek, she went inside and grabbed her purse and car keys. She’d surprise Janice and take her to breakfast. She’d hardly talked to her friend since the night of the Harvest Moon Dance.
It was a twenty-minute drive into the heart of Cheyenne where Janice had an apartment in a small but attractive complex.
Belinda wasn’t surprised when Janice answered her knock still in her nightgown. Janice wasn’t an early riser, and it was only a little after seven-thirty.
“Belinda…what are you doing here so early?” Janice raked a hand through her hair and gestured Belinda inside. She flopped down onto the sofa and Belinda sat on a chair across from her.
“I came to take you to breakfast. Wow, what happened to your shoulder?” Under the spaghetti strap of her pale pink nightgown, a vivid bruise darkened the skin of her upper shoulder.
“Oh, it’s nothing. Stupid me walked into the bathroom door in the middle of the night” She stood. “If you’ll wait just a minute, I’ll throw some clothes on.” She flashed Belinda a quick grin. “If I’m going to be awake this early, I might as well have breakfast.” She disappeared into her bedroom.
Belinda got up and wandered around the neat living room, admiring Janice’s decorative flair. There had been a time when Belinda couldn’t wait to have her own place, space not shared by her two sisters.
Despite the painful events that had driven her out of her family home to Kansas City, she’d been excited about the prospect of living on her own. It hadn’t taken long for that excitement to wan beneath the reality of a dingy studio apartment, a waitressing job, and a burgeoning pregnancy. She’d been thrilled when Abby had called to beg her to come back to the ranch.
She’d still like her own place someday, a place to share with a special man. Immediately a vision of Derek’s house filled her mind. It was designed to fill the imagination, encourage creative decorating, not as a cold, uncaring house, but rather as a warm, inviting home.
“All set.” Janice interrupted her thoughts as she walked out of the bedroom clad in a pair of jeans and a bulky multicolored sweater.
“Great, I’m starving.”
The two left the apartment and got into Belinda’s car. “I’ve got something to tell you,” Janice said as Belinda headed for the popular diner halfway between the city of Cheyenne and the Connor ranch. She wrapped her arms around herself and smiled. “I’ve been seeing somebody, and I think this time it’s the real thing.”
“Who?” Belinda knew her friend had a penchant for getting involved with losers, and hoped her new flame wasn’t married, mean, or unemployed.
“It’s somebody you know,” Janice said coyly.
“Well, that narrows it down, since I know most everyone in Cheyenne,” Belinda said dryly.
Janice giggled. “Okay, I’ll narrow it down more. It’s somebody who works at your ranch.”
Belinda frowned, running through all the workers in her mind. “Please, don’t tell me you’ve gotten yourself involved with Billy Sims.”
“No way,” Janice scoffed. “Billy Sims has more problems than I can deal with.” She hesitated a moment, a wide grin on her lips. “It’s Roger.”
“Roger?” Belinda turned into the diner parking lot, wondering if Janice knew about Roger’s background, the fact that his father was a senator.
“Roger Eaton. I know it’s crazy. I always wanted to fall for a man who owned a ranch, not one who worked on one, but somehow this time my heart is doing the talking instead of my head.”
“Janice, I’m so happy for you,” Belinda said. Apparently Roger hadn’t told Janice his real identity. Somehow this struck a romantic chord in Belinda. Roger probably wanted to see if Janice could fall in love with him as a ranch hand before telling her he was the son of a prominent senator.
“It’s early in the game still,” Janice said once the two were seated at a booth inside the busy diner. “We’ve only been seeing each other for the past week.” Her eyes sparkled with excitement. “But already I feel for him things I’ve never felt for anyone else before.”
Belinda reached across the table and touched her friend’s hand. “Truly, I’m happy for you. Roger seems like a really nice man.”
Janice nodded. “You know when he’ll be back in town? He called to tell me he had to leave on a family emergency, something about his father being ill.”
“That’s right, but we don’t know for sure when he’ll be back.”
Their conversation was interrupted by the waitress who took their orders. “So, when are we going to find a good man for you?” Janice asked once the waitress had poured them each coffee then departed.
Belinda laughed. “Just because you think you’ve found true love, don’t think you should be playing matchmaker for me.”
“Well, well, if it isn’t two of Cheyenne’
s prettiest ladies,” a deep voice boomed.
Belinda smiled at Teddy King as he sank next to Janice on the bench seat. “Hi, Bear. You’re getting a late start this morning, aren’t you?”
“Hell, no. I’ve been out at Derek’s place since the break of dawn. I decided I deserved a coffee break.” He grinned at the two women. “So what are you both doing up and out so early?”
“Belinda woke me up and dragged me here for breakfast,” Janice explained. “You know these ranch women, up before the chickens.”
Belinda laughed. “Actually, I got up early to see my family off. They all left for California this morning and once they were gone I decided to rouse Janice out of bed.”
“How are things coming on Derek’s house?” Janice asked.
“Terrific. We’re just doing the finish-up work. Derek is happy, my workers are happy, and my bank book is happy.”
“You all must have worked long hours to get the house finished so quickly,” Belinda said.
Bear nodded. “Killer hours for the most part.”
“You going to take a vacation when it’s all finished?” Janice asked.
Bear laughed. “No way. I’ve got more work lined up than I know what to do with. Business is booming.” He looked at his watch and frowned. “As a matter of fact, I’ve got to get.”
“No rest for the wicked,” Janice exclaimed.
Bear laughed again and stood. “You should know, sweetheart,” he said with a wink, then turned and left.
“He’s such a sweetie,” Belinda said when he’d gone.
“Yeah, he and I dated for a little while a couple of years ago, but there was no chemistry…no spark. You know what I mean,” Janice said.
The conversation halted as the waitress brought their breakfast orders. Belinda knew exactly what Janice meant about a missing spark. She’d had a few casual dates in the past six months, but no man she’d been out with had managed to stir the kind of spark Derek had in her.
With Derek it had been more than a sexual thing, although certainly their passion for each other had been intense. Still, what she’d felt for Derek had transcended physical attraction. She’d given him not only her heart, but her soul—and no other man had touched her deep within since him.
“Bear sure is doing great with his construction business.” Janice picked up the conversation where they had left off.
“Yes, he seems to be quite successful.”
“The best thing that ever happened to him was his dad selling the hardware store to that big chain. He told me once that it was that sale that got the money for him to set up his construction business.”
Belinda frowned thoughtfully, an old memory niggling at the back of her mind. “Didn’t Derek’s father and Bear’s father work together a long time ago?”
Janice nodded. “They were co-owners of the hardware store. From what I remember hearing at the time, Derek’s father sold his shares to Bear’s father right after the fire. Probably needed the money to help his family relocate.”
“And then the chain bought out Bear’s dad about a month later, right?” Belinda asked, reaching into the far corners of her mind.
“Yeah, I think that’s right. Why?” Janice looked at her quizzically.
Belinda shrugged. “I’m just checking my memory.”
“You’d better check out your omelet before it gets cold,” Janice observed. “There’s nothing worse than cold eggs for breakfast.”
Janice did everything with gusto. As she attacked her breakfast with single-mindedness, the conversation waned. Grateful for the relative silence, Belinda picked at her omelet as her mind whirled with new suppositions.
She’d forgotten about the hardware store sale and how Derek’s father had refused to sell…until after the night of the fire. Gossip at the time had it that the major chain had made a generous offer to buy them out, but Derek’s father wasn’t interested. Derek’s father and Bear’s father had been at odds over the potential sale.
Surely the thoughts zooming around in her head were crazy ones. Surely the fire that had destroyed Derek’s home hadn’t been set to threaten his father into the sale of the hardware store.
Still, the bullets the night before could have been just as easily meant for Derek as for her. Perhaps somebody was afraid he’d delve too deeply into the arson, discover the culprit and seek legal revenge.
If Bear’s father was responsible, how much did Bear know? Everyone had always known how close Bear and his father were.
As Belinda dug deeper into her memory, she contemplated the friendship between Derek and Bear. They had been best friends forever, but their relationship had been tinged with more than a touch of competitiveness.
Was it possible Bear wasn’t the best friend Derek thought him to be? Rather, was it possible Bear and his father had been responsible for the fire years before and now intended to cover their tracks by killing Derek?
Chapter Seven
Belinda rolled over and grabbed the phone from her bedside stand to stop the jangling ring that had awakened her. Sitting up, she breathed a sleepy hello into the receiver.
“Belinda? Did I wake you?” Abby’s voice drifted over the line.
“No…I mean yes, but that’s okay. What time is it?” Belinda asked, disoriented from her heavy sleep.
“Just a few minutes after nine. I had no idea you’d already be in bed.”
“I came to bed about half an hour ago and must have fallen asleep immediately.” Belinda turned on the lamp next to her bed in an effort to dispel the last of her sleepiness. “How are things going there?”
A pregnant pause followed the question and Belinda’s heart sank. It had been three days since her family had. left for California and she’d hoped that when she heard back from them they would have good news. The heavy silence spoke volumes.
“Not good, huh,” Belinda said softly.
“No, not good.” Abby’s voice was thick with barely held emotion. “We’ve talked to several potential investors, but nobody seems interested in investing in us.” There was another long pause. “Oh, Belinda, I’ve never felt so hopeless.”
Belinda’s heart ached with her sister’s pain and with her own. “When are you coming back?”
Abby cleared her throat, as if swallowing against a torrent of tears. “We’ve got a few more appointments lined up in the next couple of days, although they’re all long shots. We’ll probably head back this weekend.”
“Abby, don’t give up. Maybe one of the long shots, will surprise us.” Belinda wished she had more words of comfort to give her sister, but everything she thought of saying rang hollow in her own brain.
“Maybe. So, how’s everything there? Any problems?”
“No, you have nothing to worry about here,” Belinda assured her. “Roger got back yesterday. Apparently his father is stabilized, but not in very good shape.”
“And you haven’t run across those missing adoption papers anywhere?”
“No, although I’m still looking.”
Abby sighed. “I know finding those papers is important to Roger, but at the moment I can’t focus too much energy on that. My main concern is keeping our home.” She sighed once more. “I’ll let you go back to sleep. I just wanted to check in with you and let you know how things stand so far.”
“I’m glad you called, I’ve been anxious to hear from you.” Belinda squeezed the receiver tightly, wishing her sister was close enough for her to offer a reassuring hug. “Abby, we’re not going to lose our home. One way or another, everything will be fine. I promise.”
When Belinda hung up, it wasn’t Abby’s voice that reverberated in her head, rather it was Derek’s and his crazy proposal.
She got out of bed and padded down the hallway to the kitchen, too wired to go back to sleep. Once there, she made herself a sandwich and sat at the table.
The ability to save the ranch rested in her hands. All she had to do was agree to Derek’s cold, unemotional marriage proposal.
F
or the first time since he’d uttered the outrageous idea, Belinda found herself considering all it would entail. He’d said the marriage would be valid until the adoptions of his niece and nephew were finalized. How long could that take? Six months? A year at the most?
She was young, sacrificing a year of her life to save the ranch seemed a relatively small price to pay. What worried her was what else she might sacrifice in living with Derek, pretending to be his bride and mothering the two children he seemed to love.
Guilt battled with despair and she pushed her sandwich aside, no longer hungry. Yes, she could solve their financial problem—but at what cost to herself? Still, the overwhelming sadness in Abby’s voice replayed mournfully in her mind and plucked at Belinda’s heart.
If she didn’t marry Derek and if Abby didn’t find the investors needed, they would not only lose the ranch, but in all probability they would each go their own way. Luke and Abby and little Cody would build a life together, as would Colette and Hank and their baby girl.
“And what will I do?” Her words hung in the silence of the empty house. What would she do? Where would she go? She understood Bulldog’s fear, for she felt the same emotion churning inside her as she contemplated life without the ranch.
The weight of the knowledge that she could solve everything merely by agreeing to Derek’s proposition felt like a lead ball in the pit of her stomach.
She rubbed a hand over her eyes, too tired to make a rational decision tonight. Tomorrow she’d make a final decision. Tomorrow she’d decide if she could sacrifice her imminent future in exchange for assuring the continuing future of their home.
She left the kitchen and went to her bedroom. She sank into the softness of her mattress. She hadn’t seen much of Derek for the past three days, although a dozen furniture and appliance store trucks had passed her house on the way to his.
She rolled over onto her back and stared up, where the moonlight filtering through the curtains cast dancing shadows on the ceiling. Within moments, she slept.
Almost immediately she began to dream, the familiar dream of Derek…and fire. They were stretched out side by side in a field of wildflowers and sweetsmelling grass. His lips captured hers in deep, soulful kisses, and his hands stroked rivers of desire to flood through her veins. The flames that surrounded them inched closer, close enough that she couldn’t tell whether it was the proximity of the fire that burned her or Derek’s passionate caresses.